For those of you who didn’t know, I relocated to Denver for a new job 1 year ago. To mark the occasion I’ve made some observations about this mountain land that I wanted to share.
1. The Sunshine
The sun, my god. When you think of sunny states, I think of Florida, California, Hawaii. Coming from the winter grey skies of Michigan, this was a pleasant surprise. I feel like no one ever talks about how sunny it is in Colorado but apparently it’s like the best kept secret at like 300 days of sunshine a year.
2. The Dryness
I guess with the sunshine, you pay the price. I’m like a full blown scaly lizard out here. I’ve never had to moisturize so much in my life. I wake up and feel like I drank sandpaper all night.
3. The Kingdom of The Dogs
There are literally more dogs in this place than children. I mean I’m from the Midwest, so I know about dogs but this place is not messing around. The other thing about the dogs here is they are so well behaved. Like they barely bark, they walk around unleashed, they don’t chase the squirrels. I’m not sure if it’s all the weed around here, or the altitude but they are just little Colorado peaches.
4. Pop (I’m not about to say Soda) Cans
I’ll never get used to the monsters here throwing away their pop cans.
5. The Patagonia Mafia
The amount of sentences I’ve heard like “I’m so lazy, I only did like 4 miles yesterday.” or “I can’t believe I ate that whole cupcake!”. No judgment, but straight up this state is filled with athletes. It’s like being on mount Olympus and I’m unfortunately the God of Complex Carbohydrates and Aspartame.
6. Manifest Destiny
This truly is a transplant city. No one ever assumes you are from here, and if you happen to be talking to a local, they don’t love that you’ve made the journey.
7. Crappy Ragoon
I don’t know what it is, the Chinese food isn’t good. I’ve gone basic carry out, I’ve done fancy, it just doesn’t slap at altitude.
8. My Heart Still Belongs to Meijer
King Sooper’s? Safeway? I don’t think so guys.
9. Water Water Nowhere and Absolutely Not a Drop to Drink
The mountains are beautiful and majestic and still take my breath away to look at but God do I miss lakes. Here is a PSA for people who have never left Colorado: A reservoir is not the same as a lake but I appreciate you trying your best.
10. Blue State Bounty
It’s still taken some time to get used to being a liberal area but it’s really nice. Just seeing a lot of queer people openly holding hands, and businesses all advertising being LGBT friendly. It’s corny but it’s nice to feel safer in that regard.
11. Dime a Dozen Guys
A lot of handsome climber,lumberjacks,dog/plant daddies that I legitimately cannot tell apart from each other.
12. We All Scream
I don’t know what the situation is out here, but people go bananas for ice cream. It will be 42 degrees outside and there is a line out the door at Bonnie Brae’s. I’ve tried the ice cream, it’s totally good but not like different than the rest of the world.
13. Raison D’etre
It’s not a bad thing but people out here really want to know “what your deal is”. For some reason back in the Midwest nobody seemed to be interested in your hobbies because you just assume it’s like surviving the long winter, and lake life in the summer. Out in Denver, so many people have asked me and I’ve never been so aware of my lack of hobbies.
14. Colorado Thinks They Invented Beer
This is just personal snobbery. The locals are very excited to tell you about the craft brewery scene out here and tell you how Colorado is famous for their beer. Honestly it’s not bad beer at all, I’m just from Beer City, USA ya’ll.
15. Walking Etiquette
This is a double struggle because as a gay man I fit the stereotype of walking fast (despite being a short legged king) but also as a good Midwesterner who wants to have good manners. People out here have the worst walking etiquette. Trust me I have done the leg work (see what I did there?) because I spent the first several months out here just walking the park due to a lack of dates and friends. They have no concept of an implied stop, they cut you off and cut you off to walk incredibly slow in front of you.
Epilogue
Overall I’m glad I came out here, the mountains are beautiful and I do feel safer as an out gay man. I’ve met some really cool people and broke out of my routine back in Michigan. It’s very expensive and there are people and things in the Midwest I miss a lot but for now it’s still running its course. We will just have to see what’s on the other side of this mountain journey.
Twin sisters accidentally help out a Bounty Hunter with one of his targets, they end up secretly working for the Bounty Hunter while maintaining their lives in high school in a Southern Christian Community.
Where to watch: Netflix Original
What makes it great: This is such an underrated show. The girls are very funny, have great chemistry and the concept is pretty original. Feels very Buffy-esque for those of you who are missing that in your life.
Things to look past: It gets canceled after one season so you are left on a cliffhanger.
Grand Army
A varied amount of teens living in NYC go about their everyday lives. (Like that sounds boring but it’s legit what’s happening).
Where to watch: Netflix Original
What makes it great: Good diversity, the casting is very realistic. The kids are not well-known actors and do a pretty good job with their Degrassi level issues. The cinematography is very good too.
Things to look past: It’s a little bleak, the kids don’t interact with each other enough.
Daybreak
A bunch of kids living outside of LA survive a biological warfare that killed all of the adults and now they live in a dystopian world.
Where to watch: Netflix Original
What makes it great: It’s really funny and also heartwarming! The side characters really hold their own. It’s all done in a Ferris Bueller homage (Matthew Broderick has a small role in the show!)
Things to look past: One season so you don’t get much, I feel like it focuses too much on the main kid when the other characters are just as interesting.
Dear White People
Based on the movie, the tv series follows the lives of different African American college students at Winchester University. The beginning starts with a fallout on campus over a black face party at one of the fraternities.
Where to watch: Netflix Orginal
What makes it great: There is a lot of characters, and each episode follows one of their POVs. So you get a chance to latch on to different protagonists.
Things to look past: It’s a little slow, the characters don’t interact with each other enough so it can feel like a new show each episode.
You
A handsome young man who works in a bookstore becomes obsessed with a female customer and begins to date and simultaneously stalk her.
Where to watch: Netflix Original
What makes it great: I mean it’s interesting to see this kind of story through the predator’s POV. Hearing the character’s inner monologue is intriguing. A lot of literary references if that’s your thing.
Things to look past: I mean it’s frustrating just like in any anti-hero story. You get mad at the characters’ choices and stressed with all of the lying and almost being caught.
Lucifer
Disclaimer: I have only seen the first couple of seasons of this.
The devil is living in LA, and becomes interested in a detective who seems immune to his power (getting people to confess their desires). He ends up working on the LAPD with her on various cases while also entering talk therapy.
Where to watch: Aired on Fox originally but now is a Netflix Original.
What makes it great: Tom Ellis is just soooooooo effing cute. So handsome and charming. Very well cast. The concept sounds more dumb than it is in reality. The crime drama mixed with the devil just somehow works. Also any scene where he is talking to his therapist is gold.
Things to look past: The overall arcs move very slowly (at least at the point that I’m watching).
Invincible
Adult animated show about a young kid who comes from a line of superheroes and finally comes into his own powers.
Where to watch: Amazon Prime Original
What makes great: The animation is great, lots of famous actors doing the voices (Steven Yeun, Gillian Jacobs, Sandra Oh, JK Simmons, Andrew Rannells), pretty good plot twist right off the bat.
Things to look past: Gory so gory which feels like a weird thing for animation.
Made for Love
A young woman who has been married to a tech billionaire for the last 10 years escapes his compound after he puts a chip in her head.
Where to watch: HBOMax
What makes it great: Ray Romano as the dad. I was pretty not into him most of the 90s/early 00s but he has aged well. Cristin Milioti who plays the lead is very good. it’s funny and interesting.
Things to look past: Not a lot of explanation or exposition. The main villain feels a little over the top.
Panic
A teen show based on a book about a bunch of kids in Texas who compete in fear-based challenges for a chance to win a large amount of money. The poverty-ridden town of Carp, TX has done “Panic” for many years but this year someone might be taking the odds into their own hands.
Where to watch: Amazon Prime Original
What makes it great: The concept is pretty good, and the stakes feel real. The main protagonist is very likable and I could see that actress doing a lot more after the show.
Things to look past: The execution is not as good as the concept, too many storylines, not enough follow-through.
The Other Two
A decent satire of Justin Bieber where a young kid from Ohio gets discovered on YouTube and his career blows up quick. The show follows his adult siblings who live in NYC and are struggling for their own fame.
Where to watch: It was originally on Comedy Central but then it got put on HBOMax
What makes it great: Sooo funny! Great guest stars, Molly Shannon as the mom absolutely kills it. Good LBGT representation.
Things to look past: It can be occasionally a second hand cringe.
Roswell New Mexico
Based on the WB show from the early 00s “Roswell” as well as the books “Roswell High”. It’s been adapted again for the CW. Be glad they did because they got it right this time! The show is about 3 adult alien siblings living in Roswell trying to keep their identities hidden as well as a secret from the past. (I mean that’s a pretty good ass description).
Where to watch: It airs on the CW but Netflix picks it up.
What makes it great: They add some diversity from the original series. THE MUSIC! SO GOOD. 90s playlists, great covers. Strong protagonist, decent mystery, the characters are all likable and you root for them.
Things to look past: Slooooowww beginning. Really gotta give like 4 episodes and in this day and age with all the content available it makes it too easy to swipe left on something great.
Bonding
A graduate student in NYC along with her queer best friend start moonlighting as Dominatrix for hire.
Where to watch: Netflix Original
What makes it great: Cool concept, funny, queer, decently sweet despite the nature of the show.
Things to look past: The episodes are very short, and the second season is much better than the first.
Sex Education
A teenage virgin starts giving out sex advice (as his mother is a sex therapist) in exchange for money at his British high school.
Where to watch: Netflix Original
What makes it great: I mean the setting in the English countryside is just so nice. Gillian Anderson as his mom is great. Good LBGT and diversity stories.
Things to look past: It’s not quite funny/silly enough.
Russian Doll
A young woman in NYC dies suddenly on her birthday, after her death she relieves the same day over again. She is continuously stuck in the same day and it always ends in her death. She meets another man stuck in the same loop as her and they work together to solve what’s happening to them.
Where to watch: Netflix Original
What makes it great: It’s kind of Groundhog’s Day meets Happy Deathday. Natasha Lyonne is the perfect sarcastic lead, and her counterpart balances her well. It’s funny but dark.
Things to look past: The characters’ focus doesn’t seem congruent with what’s happening to them. They fixate a lot on their personal issues rather than the loop.
WandaVision
Grief-stricken Avenger Wanda Maximoff retreats to New Jersey to deal with the loss of her lover Vision. This results in her conjuring a fake reality where everyone in her town starts acting like sitcom stars. (There is not a lot of good ways to explain the premise).
Where to watch: Disney+
What makes it great: Elizabeth Olsen is an absolute treasure, such great range. The concept is very meta and original. Kathryn Hayn is an amazing addition to the MCU. It’s like confusing but in a good way.
Things to look past: There is a lack of exposition for what’s going on.
Falcon and The Winter Solider
Taking place right after the events of Avengers Endgame, Sam (Falcon) and Bucky (Winter Solider) team up to stop a group of international terrorists.
Wheretowatch: Disney+
What makes it great: The banter between the two leads is pretty good. Much more action-packed than its predecessor WandaVision. A compelling villain story.
Things to look past: Can rely too much on the action sequences versus the overall plot.
Derry Girls
Four girls living in Northern Ireland along with their English male friend navigate teenage life in the 90s. Based on the creator’s real life.
Where to watch: Netflix Original
What makes it great: It’s very funny. It’s not like dry British humor which isn’t my thing. The kids are real cute and the 90s throwbacks are a great add-on. The cast is realistic-looking as well as their interactions.
Things to look past: A couple of the episodes are kind of blah. Also, I’d recommend closed captioning for their thick Irish accents.
Girls5Eva
A washed-up girls group from the early 00s reunites after 20 years to try to have a comeback.
Where to watch: Peacock
What makes it great: The cast is amazing, very funny. Sara Bareilles as the lead is the gem we didn’t know we needed. Tina Fey is one of the writers. Great female friendships. The theme song is unbelievably catchy. The early 00s references bring me comfort.
Things to look past: Some of the B plots are kind of a yawn.
Hollywood
Taking place in 1940s Hollywood, various actors and studio executives work together to make a movie.
Where to watch: Netflix Original
What makes it great: It’s a Ryan Murphy show (Glee, American Horror Story, Scream Queens) so you know it’s going to have great outfits and one-liners. A lot of dialogue about race and sexuality. It’s not usually a Ryan Murphy style but in this most of his characters are very likable and you root for them.
Things to look past: For being as short as it is, I think it takes a little too long to get to its main conflict.
Crashing
Written by the creator of Fleabag Phoebe Waller-Bridge. A group of young adults reside in a old hospital in London. Navigating communal living, and relationships.
Where to watch: Netflix
What makes it great: It’s only 6 episodes (which upon observation I think is more of an international move) so it gets to the point relatively quickly. It’s very funny, some Type 1 Diabetes representation as well LGBT (they got your boy’s number).
Things to look past: I mean it’s only 6 episodes so the flip of getting to the point quickly is that it ends quickly and you’re left feeling slightly unresolved.
Shrill
Based on the book Shrill, follows Annie who is a plus-size woman living in Portland writing for an indy magazine.
Where to watch: Hulu Original
What makes it great: Aidy Byrant in this role is killer. Very realistic writing and dialogue. Relatable problems.
Things to look past: Sometimes the writing is so on the nose it makes you uncomfortable.
Loki
The quasi villain from the MCU gets stuck in place outside of time itself. Forced to comply with the Time Authority for his freedom.
Where to watch: Disney+
What makes it great: Who doesn’t love an antihero? Villain turned to the protagonist? it’s just fun. Plus Owen Wilson has salt and pepper hair that will make you swoon.
Things to look past: I was low-key (or Loki, see what I did there?) confused. Time stories are always a little wonky.
Generation+
A group of Gen Z teens living in California and their various issues. (I stared at this for a while but there is legitimately no other way to describe it).
Where to watch: HBOMax
What makes it great: Good diversity, similar teen tropes that exist but are well updated for the current generation. Beautiful cinematography.
Things to look past: A lot of second-hand cringe. Also, you will be too aware you are not a teen anymore. I’ve never felt more aged.
Special
Based on the novel by Ryan O’Connoll about a young gay man living in LA. He lives with Cerebal Palsy and begins a new job at the beginning of the series. He navigates his life with his disability, sexual orientation, and codependent mother.
Where to watch: Netflix Original
What makes it great: It’s very funny, and provides a point of view of some realistic but not necessarily obvious barriers to dating with a disability.
Things to look past: Cringey at times, the secondary characters’ stories feel very rushed.
The Boys
A young man seeks revenge after a group of so-called “superheroes” hurt someone close to him.
Where to watch: Amazon Prime Original
What makes it great: A good twist on the superhero tropes, very dark, but also funny. Good satire on Marvel/DC characters. The main protagonist is very charming.
Things to look past: Sooo bleak, hard to watch at points, a little gory.
Hawkeye
Following the events of Avengers Endgame, a young woman (Kate Bishop) accidentally gets mixed up with the mafia. Together Kate and Clint Barton have to work together to keep both of their families safe.
Where to watch: Disney+
What makes it great: Takes place around Christmas so you get some nice Die Hard vibes. Hailee Steinfeld is a great new edition to the MCU. Jeremy Renner breathes a little new life into Hawkeye. It’s funny, good villains and cameos.
Things to look past: I think it’s too short, I think some of the relationships didn’t get enough air time for some of the plot to hit as hard as the writers intended.
Harley Quinn
Animated DC adult show about the adventures of Harley Quinn.
Where to watch: HBOMax
What makes it great: It’s like a for-real adult humor, almost too crass at times. Very funny, a good satire on superhero material. Poison Ivy is a great secondary lead. Mixes humor with actual conflict pretty well.
Things to look past: Like I said it can occasionally be too crass.
The Society
A group of high schoolers go on a field trip and when they return to their town everyone has vanished. They also discover they are not able to leave town. Now they must find order and function amongst each other.
Where to watch: Netflix Original
What makes it great: It’s very enticing, a good mystery, the conflict is good. Lord of The Flies vibes for sure. Diverse cast and storylines.
Things to look past: It only ran for one season and gets canceled due to COVID. Even though we are left on a cliffhanger it doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy the journey.
Cruel Summer
A young girl goes missing in the 90s, the story is told over the three years between her life before being abducted, her capture, and her release. The story also follows the other lead, a young girl in town who may have been involved in her abduction.
Where to watch: Hulu
What makes it great: The episodes take turns telling the story from each girl’s point of view. The concept is very good, both actresses do a very good job. The storytelling approach is creative, the mystery is enticing.
Things to look past: Some of the conflicts outside of the initial conflict are kind of inconsistent. Also, some of the production choices are off (i.e. the lighting).
Love Victor
A loose spinoff from the movie Love, Simon. Victor is a new kid living in Creekwood (where Love Simon takes place) navigating his confusion over his sexuality.
Where to watch: Hulu Original
What makes it great: I think Victor is more charming than Simon. Better diversity in this show than in the movie, the friends and side characters are more involved.
Things to look past: It can get a tiny bit hokey. Could use a little more edge.
Honorable Mentions
These are all shows I’ve mentioned in previous posts but I think deserve more attention.
Community
Taking place in a community college seven students from different walks of life come together to create a study group. #sixseasonsandamovie
Where to watch: Netflix and Hulu
What makes it great: The show is just so funny and heartwarming. Every time I watch there are new references I catch or reoccurring bits. Very good tender moments. Lots of very smart meta homages.
Things to look past: I mean honestly nothing, just that sometimes the episodes target a genre I don’t care about.
Scream The TV Series
Not really taking place inside the same world as the movies, but is the same creator. There is a slasher in town targeting a group of teens tying back to an old town legend.
Where to watch: Netflix
What makes it great: The mystery is pretty good. Somehow the slasher genre shouldn’t work as a tv show but it does.
Things to look past: Season 3, it’s a totally different story with different writers but its’ not as good.
Search Party
A group of shallow Brooklyn millennials discover an old classmate has gone missing, bored with their own lives they decide to look for her.
Where to watch: HBOMax
What makes it great: So funny, the mystery is great. A dark comedy for sure, and they’re really aren’t any lulls in the story.
Things to look past: Even though it’s intentional the characters can be very unlikeable at times. The last season kind of goes off the rails too.
Marvel’s The Runaways
Part of the MCU. A group of privileged teens living in LA. discover their parents are supervillains. They decide to work together to find a way to stop their parent’s nefarious plans while also discovering their own family secrets relating to their own superpowers and weapons.
Where to watch: Hulu Original
What makes it great: The kids have good very diversity, good LGBT representation> Good themes of morality, family dynamics. The kids are all very likable, good villains introduced, the parents’ storylines are intriguing.
Things to look past: The pacing is a little off, goes too slow at parts and then rushes at the finale.
I moved back to my parents house in the year 2019 when I went back to nursing school. I also dropped down my hours at work. I needed a way to passively make some money that didn’t involve a webcam. I also needed to maintain the illusion of independence by being away from my parents as much as possible. So I put out a post about being around to dogsit. Since I was starting school in the summer, I wasn’t doing much travel so I was available and it seemed like an easy way to supplement my part time income without sacrificing my study time. My sensibility paid off and I got a decent amount of requests.
Here are some of the key things I learned and follow.
1.I’m not actually a dog person. I don’t hate dogs by any means but I don’t care about stopping and petting them when they walk by or want to look at pictures of new puppies.
*Don’t hate but not super into them.
2. The hook is I’m responsible. In the sense I don’t have any responsibility for any children or pets of my own. I might not be overly affectionate towards pets but I will feed them, walk them, and not leave them crated for an unreasonable amount of time.
3. You have to send photographs. Usually they won’t ask because they don’t want to seem like a crazy dog person but they love when you do it.
4. I have a strict no snooping attitude. I will not open drawers but I will physically walk into every room because I play a game of House Hunters with every house.
5. I’ll eat your snacks. I mean I won’t pull out your frozen ham and make Christmas dinner. I will eat all of your chips though.
6. People think leaving detailed notes are neurotic but it’s actually the best. You’d be surprised how many people won’t tell you where the dog food is kept.
7. I’m not going to drink your booze. People are always very forthright with giving me permission to drink. At best I’ll steal one craft beer.
8. I’m going to build a nest. I don’t know what it is about other people’s homes but it’s an introvert dream where you feel like you can’t do anything or go out so you just bunker down with the best tv.
9. I probably won’t sleep in your bed. A guest bed sure, and I always feel bad because people are like “we just washed the sheets for you”. Depending on my comfort level with you, I will probably sleep on the couch.
10. I’ll ruin your streaming algorithms. Sorry if you were really into Scandal and The Great British Bake Off, Now Netflix thinks you’re a sad gay teen.
Well it’s later than I would’ve wanted it to be but my third semsester is offically wrapped up and here is what I learned and experienced this semester.
1.So we entered a new world this semester starting out with my OB rotation.
Our first really niche rotation. I went in with an open mind and even more gratitude to not have a uterus. Women are warriors.
2. I learned being a male on an OB unit is…uhhhhh….awkward.
I basically have to talk to women my age and ask how their nipples are healing and roughly how much blood is in their underwear.I would do my best to really emphasize that I’m gay to bring down some suspected creepiness. I might as well have come in and been like “Hey girrrlllfriend, I can tell from your chart you need some Motrin and some juicy gossip”. Setting my people back 100 years.
3. Then onto Pediatrics.
I’ve been a camp counsler, worked at a daycare, and a center for children with autism, and am a moderately attentive uncle and I still don’t know shit about how to talk to kids. I feel like I’m mostly like I don’t know what Paw Patrol is and please don’t bite me.
4. Also co-currently we were taking Community Health.
My group decided to work with an organization called Senior Neighbors. It was a cool place and we mostly just chatted and take their blood pressures.
5. Pandemic Strikes
So I didn’t really get to do much of my peds rotation and Past Rob was so dumb to think it would only be a couple of weeks.
6. The Delay.
Our cohort had our last classes scheduled over the summer and graduation planned for August but amognst all the news they canceled our current classes and summer classes. Letting us know we would resume in the fall. We all took it pretty hard, we know considering the world at large it’s not the worst news but we still took a moment to cope.
7. The Return.
After having all of April off, we came back in May to make up a class before resuming our delay. We were happy to be back in clincial but after OB/Peds which have a lot of observation I pretty much forgot how to do an IV push or write a decent care plan.
8.Online testing is for the birds.
Taking online tests are even more stressful. There are so many steps to make sure you aren’t cheating and you have to do it on a webcam and you feel like the technocology always seems like its going to glitch out.
9. The plus side is I think my study group has really gotten into step.
Basically my friend Megan just teaches me all the material and I nod attentively.
10. Since we are near the end I spend a lot of time thinking I should know a lot more at this point than I do.
I watch the nurses at work and I think “Am I supposed to know about that? I don’t know about that.” and there isn’t that much school left.
Well folks! Volume 3! Things are heating up in the news. The journey from bedroom to the couch has gotten drastically more interesting. Just kidding it’s the same boring bullshit it was last week.
1.Working more than more part time status mixed with the stimulus check made me look at my bank account like a baller. By baller I mean I was dangerously close to over drafting this week.
2. Got a projector for my birthday. Been a dream ever since I saw Disney Channel’s Smarthouse and the kid has an entire wall that projects his video game. Now all I need is a rug that absorbs all of my milkshakes.
*I have since gotten my sheet and screen more proportionate.
3. School is coming back into play. We got word we are making up one of our classes and we can actually go to clinicals. We are still delayed graduating a semester but at least we are getting back on the horse soon.
4. Katie Selleck made me watch TikTok and I think I have a crush on the guy who does Dadosaur.
5. Watched all the Hunger Games movies in anticipation of the new prequel book coming out next month. A little too dark for this era in history.
6. I ran outside. I’ve done that like a total of 6 times in my 31 years living outside of high school gym class. It sucked, I don’t get the big whoop. The only view in my neighborhood is a taco bell, judgmental seniors and stripper pole gym. So I’m ready for the gym to reopen.
7. My sister’s girlfriend left our bubble but came right back with her sweet puppy. He’s a little bit in a bitey phase but adorable.
8. I recently did the essential hours time at Meijer. It was dopppppeeeeee. Not busy, all single adults keeping their distance, things were stocked and the vibe was so much more chill. Still no Diet Sunkist though, what’s up with that?
9. I discovered this game via my friends Ryan and Julian: Friday the 13th on switch. It’s super difficult, super addicting. You basically run around trying to kill off the counselors. Sounds gory and horrible but like I feel like our collective bar is much lower for horrible than it used to be so don’t judge.
10. My general observation is that people are really over social distancing/precautions. I’m not saying I agree, but I notice more people suggesting others to come over, or not wearing masks outside or just pushing the limits more. I’m not getting on a soap box but I’ve just noticed people seem to be over it.
Welcome to Volume 2. I can hardly remember my life before Corona times. When I watch television and people hug I automatically cringe. I keep thinking kids are going to use this against me in the future in such ways as “Mister you’re so old! He probably lived through Corona” and I’ll nod my head and walk away as they jet pack away.
Here are my updates:
1. I don’t have many updates because it’s basically when you talk to a person it’s like “How is your house? Mine is the same.”
2. I can’t help but wonder if Zoom invented Corona because I straight up have not heard of them before this.
*Zoom
3. My sister’s girlfriend got an adorable puppy but then decided it was best to take him back to her parents and spend the rest of quarantine there leaving Mary and I to fend for ourselves.
4. I had to officially quit my job at the Center For Autism. I also can’t believe I still work there? I feel like my employment there has been hanging on by a thread since Nam. I say I won’t be back but I’ll probably be back.
The great tragedy is that is one of my best ID pics.
5. I had my Corona Birthday. Honestly could’ve been worse. Sucks to have a pandemic birthday but my friends sent some really kind gifts and I got to Zoom with my friends. My friend Alexis had a lovely cake delivered and I still got to watch a theatrical viewing of Josie and The Pussycats like I do every year.
6. My house finished out our MCU adventure. I feel like so much more stuff clicked this time around and while in my head I knew it wasn’t logical but a part of me felt the quarantine would end when we finished the movies.
7. We got masks at work. While I’m beyond grateful we have the PPE we need, I will say it’s a long 12 hour shift breathing in your own coffee breath and feeling the sweat form around your mouth while your ears are chaffed to shit.
8. Mary and I decided to keep our movie routine. I found a Buzzfeed list of great films for cinema fans we can work through as well as taking turns forcing the other one to watch a movie the other hasn’t seen. I already forced 22 Jump street on her so you can tell we are sophisticated.
9.Community is on Netflix! I mean it’s been on Hulu for years. So people have had their chance but Netflix is more pushy so I’m hoping it spreads the gospel better. It’s easily one of my favorite shows and the perfect light hearted comedy in these dark times. Also let’s be real you have all already watched The Office, Parks and Rec, Schitt’s Creek so this is on deck now.
Also if you’re going to be difficult at least try Happy Endings on Hulu or Derry Girls on Netflix.
10. Meijer got more scary, more masks (which is great) but the tone got tense. I mean I’m glad people are distancing more but the vibe is bad jujus now. Also they like never have Diet Sunkist or chain lube for my bike and what’s up with that?
Well here we are folks. The quarantine continues on and I guess one of my hobbies is this blog so I’m trying to take this time to utilize this hobby.
So far here is my situation in quarantine. My parents are still in Florida and now presumably staying down there. I live in their house but my younger sister and her girlfriend moved in for the pandemic so I wouldn’t have to be alone.
I’m still working but only part time (about 24 hours a week) and my sister Mary and her girlfriend Emily are temporarily laid off. I had to finish one of my classes online and the other got canceled so for the most part I’m not in school and my whole program got pushed back a semester.
So here we are, just trying to do our best. Since the world is chaos now, all I can do to help my mental health is try to maintain some kind of routine.
Around 9:00 AM: I make some kind of breakfast for the ladies. I can poach an egg so like I’m pretty good at breakfast.
That’s a breakfast casserole. I got the recipe from one of my professors. I know it’s potentially the end of the world because I just pulled that crockpot out of the box from 2015.
Then around 11:30 I do some form of exercise. Before quarantine was super tight I would help my older sister walk her gang of dogs. Now I just go on walks alone or ride my bike.
Afterwards Mary will make us some lunch and we often watch House Hunters as a family. Where Mary yells at every couple for their dumb opinions and Emily was shook to know they never pick the furnished home. Also we watched a lot of them that take place in GR. I can’t help but think the producers tell them. “Choose a bit and commit. If you can’t stand a closed concept house because if the way you describe yourself is that you are always in the kitchen and can’t see your kids I want to hear about it. If you think you are saying too much, trust us you aren’t saying it enough.”
Slowly the afternoon comes and it’s Rob Time. I watch a little bit of Tiger King to be part of the culture zeitgeist. Then I picked up Orange Is The New Black. I had previously watched the first few seasons but decided to finish it out as well slowly work through my “watch later” folder on YouTube.
Then dinner comes and Emily has been making some wonderful food. They are even so kind as to make me food when I come home from work. I try my best to not come off like Darren Stevens from Bewitched expecting a martini right when I walk in.
The best part is promptly every night at 8:30 we sit down to watch one of the marvel movies. I’ve seen most of them and Mary and Emily are fairly new. I mostly police them from looking at their phones and find pleasure in Emily’s genuine shock to every major event. (Tonight is Black Panther)
Finally I lay in bed scrolling through YouTube or Tinder while Hulu plays American Dad! or Family Guy in the background until I finally drift off and the time loop can start back over.
So this past week I went to Florida for Spring Break. I realized the whole time I did my first undergrad I never traveled anywhere for Spring Break (with the exception of like a day trip to Chicago) and now that I’m back in school I did observe Spring Break and go to Florida and wanted to document my experience.
Now before anyone gets too excited thinking I went to Miami and did shooters and blasted my nips for all to see, lower your expectations as I was in the exotic location of Englewood, Florida: The unofficail birthplace of the strip mall.
Like a true episode of The Kardashians, my sisters joined me on this exciting journey because TWIST our parents live in Englewood.
The players in this story are our parents (Bob&Sandy), my older sister Sam and my younger sister Mary.
First things first: our flight was at 6 AM which meant we had to be there at 4:30 and leave our hour by 4. It was cute.
Plane was busy af but we seriously made it by the hair of our chinny chin chins. We landed in sunny Punta Gorda (Spanish for Fat Tip, so have fun with that).
^^ I don’t know who that person is in front of me but give me a break it was 8:30 in the morning and I had been up for forever and just needed a good blog picture.
Then like lost little chickadees we found our parents.
We haven’t seen them since roughly Christmas. My little sister Mary is running right for Dad and my mom is clearly getting ready to throw a little shade at something we are doing. Cause I learned “Florida Sandy” is a secret shade queen.
Also due to peer pressure from Mary, I decided to trail a mustache in Flordia (which might what my mom is reacting to in the previous picture.
Still collecting data on whether it was a success or not.
Shade did come with breakfast while we looked around the condo. (we had all been there before at various times but it had been a bit).
Mary immediatley fell asleep and I noted all the new mermaid decor.
There was sooooo much more but I was as tired as Mary and that’s the best I can do. Lady loves scales and swimming.
We started most our mornings off with a bike ride which while very windy was my favorite way to start the day.
One of our favorite adventrues is to go to Lizard Cove (we named it that ourselves). It’s a fishing bridge with a shit ton of lizards and Sam was on a real creature hunt this trip.
Spent some time at the beach at Boca Grande
While Sam and Mary thrive on the beach, I am reminded for the umpteenth time I am not a beach person. I’ll just never get the appeal of walking on uneven earth and baking in the sun. I can hang there for like 40 minutes max but the rest of the Dines set up camp.
By this point in the trip, being with our parents has completly reverted the three of us to acting like we are adolescents. Getting mad for taking the last piece of toast or giving side eye when somebody is making too many comments during a viewing of Jumanji. On the other side of adolesence we are just acting like total spazzes.
The Next Day the Dine sibs took their adventure on the road. We headed to Orlando to Disney but the night before we headed out to Downtown Disney. Which was an experience.
It is a lawless place where people have no sense of traffic flow and will wait in line at a Ghiradelli’s for a free chocolate for over an hour for something they can get for like 25 cents. Then like true tourists we ate a Rainforest Cafe where I’m pretty sure our server needed to be talked off a ledge as she did about 7 different birthday songs over the course of an hour for different screaming families.
We went to Disney world the next day. We started at Epcot and we had a great time and did an Orlando walk around the world and by Canada my bloodsugar dropped and I demanded some poutine. My friend Nick joined us because you can’t go on a rides as a threesie. You need an even number. We hit up Magic Kingdom and ended up doing 30,000 steps and had to bolt out of there like a bat out hell after the parade to beat all the traffic.
We overestimated our youthful energy and only had a hotel the night before Disney and for sure thought we could handle driving back 2 hours to our parents. Since it had been 9 hours isnce our last meal I forced Mary to stop at fast food. She already didn’t want us eating in her new car and this particular McDonalds took about 30 minutes and when we got our food, it was just a random assornment of McDonalds treats and not really anything we ordered. We were hungry enough we just didn’t care and ate it.
The next day after our Disney hangover we basically napped and swam the day away. We went with our parents to the Moose Lodge to do their weekly trivia (they are just living it up right, eh folks?). The Moose is a members only bar where you do a group prayer at 6 PM followed by The Pledge of Allegiance and you can also smoke inside so you get the picture of what I’m working with here. We got second place in trivia all because I’m too gay to properly know Arnold Schwazenegger movies and I was too obssessed with the WB lineup to care about middleschool geography.
The last day of the trip was Sam’s birthday. We went to see some dolphins at the pier, then went to Venice, Fl. Which if you have never been I highly reccomend it if you are completely out of seashells or scented candles because it’s all you can buy there. Then we sang a quiet happy birthday to Sam while my dad slept on the couch but did eat some delicious cheesecake and started to eat it before she got in the room. We might not be the best family. Then we all got in the backseat of our parents’ minivan and headed off to the airport.
After a long day’s journey into night, we made it back in one piece and very slowly rejoining the world.
Well it’s time to talk about what I learned this semester. I’m a little older, no wiser and have had the better part of my personality sucked out of me.
Here we go!
1.Geriatrics: expectations vs reality.
Disguised as like “Health Illness Concepts” but it’s straight up a geriatrics course. A lot of current nurses warned me this was their least favorite rotation but honestly it was fine. The theory portion was a lot tougher than classes had been at this point. The clinical was in a long term care facility and it wasn’t so bad. Reminded me of my Pine Rest days. I liked the homey feel and getting to know the residents. It’s not glamorous by any means but it has its perks.
2. I felt like I got to know my cohort better.
This semester we merged the two cohorts together so I’ve met mostly everyone now. I feel like clinical has made us feel like we’ve been in the foxholes together and since we’ve been going straight since the end of April everyone is kind over any projected personification and is being stripped down to their raw personalities.
3. Let’s get surgical, surgical surgical. I wanna make your body bleed.
I got to observe a surgery this semester. I don’t think the surgical life is the one for me. A patient can’t laugh at my jokes with a tube in their throat and no one warns you about the burning flesh smell. (Except for Nicole Boomgaard, thank you for the heads up.)
4. I’ve had to attempt to grow thicker skin.
Nursing school is a constant state of feedback and evaluation. Every thought and action you have is questioned and while it’s a good way to promote critical thinking it’s also a way to constantly be filled with self-doubt. It’s easy to take things personally and it can sour your spirit but ultimately it’s best for your learning but hard on a sensitive soul such as myself.
5. The pharmacy is open.
We started off just talking about a few meds at a time but now we are in it med wise. It was a lot of medications to learn with weird strategies to memorize. One involving a blind, pooping, dinosaur as way to remember Tetracyclines.
6. It is clear we need a break.
The collective exhaustion is palpable. The irritably, the sleepy eyes and weight gain (speaking for myself not calling anyone out). Everyone started out so sweet and perky and now even the Elle Woods type people are saying shit like “I don’t know what the fuck she was talking about it lecture today, I was just on amazon the whole time.”
7. I experienced my first code blue.
It was a jarring experience and some of us were able to do CPR on this patient. It was a great learning experience for us, but definitely a wake up call to what nursing can look like.
8. The actual school is busier.
When we started it was summer and literally no one was on campus but us. We could eat at Subway alone in the basement and park like the gods we thought we were. Now we have to leave an hour earlier to get good parking for afternoon lecture and are surrounded by 18 year olds to make me feel 100.
9. I am now that person who takes two days to respond to a message.
When someone texts me or emails me I have to internalize it for a solid 48 hours before I can respond unless the question “are you hungry?”. My brain is just out of room and I feel like a terrible friend/son/brother but whenever I have any down time I just want to lay down.
10. Even though all you do is study you still feel like you know nothing.
Which is obviously not true but everything is so intimidating. They will be talking about something in class and everyone is nodding along and you’re like “am I the only one who is lost or doesn’t know what a saline lock means?” Once you talk to everyone you realize they are all just faking it too.
1. Current nurses will warn you about your upcoming pain.
They look at you like the sweet baby nursling that you are. All the nurses will groan at the mention of nursing school and tell you how it was one of the most challenging points in their life.
2. Some people will you give you attitude about going to a community college.
Between having to constantly explain that yes you can get your RN lincense with an associates degree and professors comparing this program to a bachelors, you just need everyone to chill.
3. Show up so enthusiastic on the first day.
Start with such naive thoughts, like “why is everyone making such a big deal out of this?” or “If I stay on top everything and follow a strict schedule I’ll be okay.”
Cute. So cute.
4. Spending the summer in mild isolation.
Starting nursing school in the summer is an extra bummer because you are just watching a lot of insta stories of people drinking at the beach while you watch videos about gas exchange in your parents basement.
5. Even your weekends aren’t safe.
Cause that’s when you get to go to your part time job.
6. People are not aware you’re not a nurse yet.
It’s already begun where people tell me their weird symptoms and want to know my opinion. While sweet, I’m mostly like “do you want me to listen to your bowel sounds cause that’s all I really got at this point.”
7. The anxiety in school is palpable.
You could cut all the tension with a knife on an exam day.
8. It starts relativeily easy.
You’re on top of things the first days and the concepts aren’t too crazy yet.
Then it gets so tricky..
Like out of nowhere you’re like “what the hell is perfusion and is functional ability supposed to be this complicated?”
9. The first skills check off is so nerve racking.
You practive on everoyne you know and psych yourself up to prepare.
Then after a few weeks…
You’re so used to being watched and being evaluated it doesn’t matter.
10. Hygiene, diet and sleep all fall to the wayside.
Baggy eyes, washing my hair like once a week. Tried to do Weight Watchers during this first semester, That was cute, did you know you’re not allowed to uncontrollably eat donuts during it?
11. You have pretty instant comradery with the other students.
You walk out of an exam and you look back at your fellow tributes like this.
12. There is a constant fear of failing out.
People are always using the phrase like “this class is meant to weed people out” and everyone is very paranoid they aren’t going to make it.
Rob Writes & Bikes 